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Magix 'n' Curses
..the argument continues

Sunday, July 30, 2006

Symptoms


When I lose my appetite...



When I'm unable to sleep...



When I'm found grinning to myself in badly concealed glee...



When I keep asking people what date it is...



When I start doing random weird stuff embarrassing myself in the process...



When I appear constantly restless...



When I start complaining about the days being too long...









...Then you can safely assume a new Rahman Album is about to be released.


PS.
Why, what did you think? :)

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Why? Why? Why?


How do you make a line shorter when you have no means of erasing it?
You draw a bigger line next to it.

Just when I thought things couldn't get worse when I found out Asin is acting with Simbhu in the movie AC, I got another news.
That she's acting in Dasavatharam with "him".

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Glossophobia


Nope. It isn't the fear of all things bright and shiny! It's stage fright. Something that has had me in its vice-like grip from the time my math teacher asked me to come forward and recite the multiplication tables of 3.

I've been avoiding going up on stage like plague, and my school principal had done everything she could to get me up there and speak. And I felt very proud of myself when I left school to know I'd evaded her attempts for 10 years! For some strange reason, no one else felt proud of me for that.

I'd successfully avoided taking seminars too, in college. Until a couple of days back.

"Nee thaan pa seminar edukkarae, Networks basics pathi.. idha vechu thaan unakku mark kudukka poraen". These words from my lecturer seemed straight out of my worst nightmare. My "Sir, mudiyaadhu sir.. anga pona nadunguvaen" pleadings fell on deaf ears. And he gave me less than a day to prepare. It was the beginning of the end.

The next day I was confident he wouldn't turn up to class. In my final year, no one does!! Things started looking more and more like scenes from a nightmare when I saw him turn up on time. He looked at me and gestured to the board. "That's it", I thought to myself, "I'm doomed".

What happened for the next few minutes, I'd never know. All I remember is getting up on the li'l dais kinda thingy in front of the board. And starting to speak about networks.

My eyes slid out of focus. There was a dull buzzing sound filling my ears. At one point of time, it grew so loud that I couldn't hear myself. My mind played strange tricks on me, coz every word I uttered sounded garbled and full of static, to me. On top of all this was the most confident inner voice, I've heard in my life.

I don't think I've introduced you guys to my inner voice. It's this squeaky little thing, that helps me be a chamathu fellow. Says all the right things at the right times, but also makes me feel guilty when I unintentionally hurt someone and constantly bugs me to apologise till I do so. But at times, when it is most confident, the Sachin-like voice takes on an Amitabh-like baritone. Giving me clear instructions of what to do.

But what I heard that day was a voice unlike any I've heard so far. So confident and deep, that it'd give Amitabh Bachchan a complex. And it was giving me clear instructions, guiding me on.

To drop my papers and flee through the door.


As my eyes slid further out of focus, more static filled my ears and I couldn't hear Mr. Inner Voice either. My legs gave me an impression that I wasn't too far of from the epicentre of an earthquake. My hands trembled so badly that I had to put it in my pocket, and then take it out just as quickly when I realised it'd look worse! Inspite of being a computer science student, I was pretty certain I'd introduced a new disorder to the medical field. HAPS. Harish's Acute Perspiration Syndrome.

That was when I saw the most inspiring, the most beautiful and the most morale boosting sight I'd ever seen in my life. The message I'd scribbled at the end of my notes - "You're still alive. Congratulations. Now get out of there!"

Everything came back to me clearly when I sat down at my desk. I realised the magnitude of what I'd gone through when my friend said "dei, bayangarama nadungarae da!". I removed my footwear and kept my cold feet on the floor. And realised I'd made Krishna Jayanthi type footmarks out of sweat.

That was my moment of truth. All my well wishers flashed before my eyes. Those who had my best interests in mind. I recollected how they said "To overcome your fear, face it head on", "Go up on stage once, you'll get over it once and for all". And for one fleeting moment I was filled with an emotion I'd never felt before in my life.

Something of a cross between anger and disappointment when I realised what a big fat lie it all was! I'm now more petrified of going up on stage than ever!!!

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

When hormones take over


Ashwin squeezed his pimple till it burst. He peered into the mirror, checking out the result of his little battle with the zit as he combed his hair.

"This is it", he thought to himself. "I'm not going to hold back any longer. Everyone's seen it, I've remained a good boy for long enough. And if I am to watch it, I'll do it legally."

His eyeballs gave stiff competition to Pandiarajan's. He was noticeably fidgety as he stepped out of his house. "Where are you off to, Ashu?", his mom yelled out from the kitchen. His heart skipped a beat. "N.. Nowhere ma.. Fancied a walk down the road."

He crossed the main road, and felt as if every single pair of eyes was trained on him, digging deep into his soul and making him feel more guilty than he was now, if that were possible. He involuntarily shuddered as he saw the traffic policeman staring at him suspiciously. He hastened his pace. "Oy!", the policemen called out. Ashwin broke into cold sweat. Almost paralysed with fright, he couldn't being himself to turn. He heard the approaching footsteps with increasing dread. His body twitched as he felt a hand on his shoulder, and slowly wheeled himself around on the ball of his heels. "You should be a bit more careful, boy. You dropped your wallet." The policeman walked away from Ashwin, who was engulfed in buckets of sweat.

Ashwin continued, not allowing this incident to deter him from his purpose. He had made up his mind, and was not planning to let anything get in the way. He saw his destination, aglow with bright lights and special offer banners strung up. "Univercell. The most popular cellphone shop in Chennai. Who would've even thought....", his thoughts trailed off as he realised no amount of pulling could open the door. "Excuse me sir, it goes the other way", said the security at the door, and pushed the door open. He'd come running up to the landing, leaving the security guy of the next building waiting to resume their chat. Ashwin gave him a sheepish grin, which looked more like a constipated grimace, as he walked in. The chill blast of the AC hit him, helping him relax a bit.

"May I help you, sir?", a floorwalker enquired, giving Ashwin his second shock of the day. "Why do these people like talking to my back?", he thought as he hemmed and hawed at the floorwalker. "I'm Mani. How may I assist you?", the floorwalker enquired again. Ashwin scratched his head, and looked around to see that he was in a very busy place. "May I talk to you alone, please?", Ashwin asked, and dragged a confused Mani to a corner of the store.

"I've never watched any before. What would you recommend?", he whispered. "Watched any of what?", Mani asked, still puzzled. Ashwin looked around to see if anyone was watching. He whispered again, "Porn! What else?" Mani looked totally lost. "Sir, this is a cellphone shop. Did I hear you right? You want porn??"

It was Ashwin's turn to look confused. "You.. You mean you don't sell porn?", he whimpered, his eyes glinting with tears of shame. Mani gave him a comforting pat on the back, "Of course not! We are one of the biggest players in mobile phones. What made you think we sell such stuff?"

Ashwin beckoned him outside, as he trugded on like a zombie, and pointed at the banner.




Disclaimer:
This is not an attempt to tarnish the company's image. Blame it on Ashwin's foolishness! :)

Saturday, July 08, 2006

The Oscar speech, almost..


Thank you TFMPage.. if you hadn't changed your looks, I would never started blogging.

Thank you people.. If it weren't for you, I'd still not have been blogging after 20 months

And finally, Thank you dear blog.. If it weren't for you, I'd never have been placed in such a big company*!

updated:
*Jus realised I hadn't mentioned the word Infosys anywhere! :) aNTi** comment padicha aparam!!

** neenga unga paera ennava vechundaalum, ungala aNTi nu thaan koopiduven :P