Wednesday, July 12, 2006
Ashwin squeezed his pimple till it burst. He peered into the mirror, checking out the result of his little battle with the zit as he combed his hair.
"This is it", he thought to himself. "I'm not going to hold back any longer. Everyone's seen it, I've remained a good boy for long enough. And if I am to watch it, I'll do it legally."
His eyeballs gave stiff competition to Pandiarajan's. He was noticeably fidgety as he stepped out of his house. "Where are you off to, Ashu?", his mom yelled out from the kitchen. His heart skipped a beat. "N.. Nowhere ma.. Fancied a walk down the road."
He crossed the main road, and felt as if every single pair of eyes was trained on him, digging deep into his soul and making him feel more guilty than he was now, if that were possible. He involuntarily shuddered as he saw the traffic policeman staring at him suspiciously. He hastened his pace. "Oy!", the policemen called out. Ashwin broke into cold sweat. Almost paralysed with fright, he couldn't being himself to turn. He heard the approaching footsteps with increasing dread. His body twitched as he felt a hand on his shoulder, and slowly wheeled himself around on the ball of his heels. "You should be a bit more careful, boy. You dropped your wallet." The policeman walked away from Ashwin, who was engulfed in buckets of sweat.
Ashwin continued, not allowing this incident to deter him from his purpose. He had made up his mind, and was not planning to let anything get in the way. He saw his destination, aglow with bright lights and special offer banners strung up. "Univercell. The most popular cellphone shop in Chennai. Who would've even thought....", his thoughts trailed off as he realised no amount of pulling could open the door. "Excuse me sir, it goes the other way", said the security at the door, and pushed the door open. He'd come running up to the landing, leaving the security guy of the next building waiting to resume their chat. Ashwin gave him a sheepish grin, which looked more like a constipated grimace, as he walked in. The chill blast of the AC hit him, helping him relax a bit.
"May I help you, sir?", a floorwalker enquired, giving Ashwin his second shock of the day. "Why do these people like talking to my back?", he thought as he hemmed and hawed at the floorwalker. "I'm Mani. How may I assist you?", the floorwalker enquired again. Ashwin scratched his head, and looked around to see that he was in a very busy place. "May I talk to you alone, please?", Ashwin asked, and dragged a confused Mani to a corner of the store.
"I've never watched any before. What would you recommend?", he whispered. "Watched any of what?", Mani asked, still puzzled. Ashwin looked around to see if anyone was watching. He whispered again, "Porn! What else?" Mani looked totally lost. "Sir, this is a cellphone shop. Did I hear you right? You want porn??"
It was Ashwin's turn to look confused. "You.. You mean you don't sell porn?", he whimpered, his eyes glinting with tears of shame. Mani gave him a comforting pat on the back, "Of course not! We are one of the biggest players in mobile phones. What made you think we sell such stuff?"
Ashwin beckoned him outside, as he trugded on like a zombie, and pointed at the banner.
This is not an attempt to tarnish the company's image. Blame it on Ashwin's foolishness! :)