Magix 'n' Curses
..the argument continues

Friday, December 02, 2005

Shrieking Shack

An unpublished write-up by an investigative journalist written almost 10 years ago.

November 15, 1995

Residents of Nippon Society, Juhu Church are quite used to shrill high-pitched shrieks coming from the most celebrated mansion in their area. The Tandon House has been the source of such disturbance for over a year now. The bloodcurdling screams that rent the air at frequent intervals resulted in the alarmed neighbours holding a meeting and deciding to approach the Tandons and demand an explanation. They'd held back for a while owing to the fact that Raveena had just only made it to bigtime showbiz recently, having got a major breakthrough with Mohra (1994).

The explanation given by the Tandons satisfied the residents of Nippon Society and they promised to remain tightlipped about the issue since it could hamper the girl's future in Hindi Cinema. Some were even amused and everytime they heard the screams after that, they chuckled instead of scurrying for cover. When this writer tried to persuade the residents to talk in an attempt to get to the root of this mystery, they vehemently refused to comment. They had no intentions of embarrassing their golden girl whom they'd seen grow up in front of their eyes into a ravishing beauty and felt she should be celebrated, now that she was finally getting noticed.

The Tandons too refused to comment. "It's nothing. Forget it. Raveena's not feeling too well at the moment. So if you could excuse us...", father Ravi Tandon trailed off, making it quite clear that it was time to clear off before he called the guards. The immediate suspicion was that the leading lady was under considerable trauma after her failed love-life was splashed all over the glossies. "Was she psychologically affected?", "Is she visiting a psychiatrist?", "Is she being frequented by err.. her ex-boyfriend trying to patch up?" The response to all these questions was a categorical No, but uttered with obvious sincerity.

An investigative journalist's got to do what an investigative journalist's got to do. The mystery was eventually cracked. It was found that the Tandon House was infested with rats and Miss Raveena, inspite of being the animal lover that she was, wasn't too fond of dirty rodents. This led to another mystery. Why was the Tandon House alone attacked by rats while every other residence in the neighbourhood was free from these pesky creatures? I reiterate, an investigative journalist's got to do what an investigative journalist's got to do. This mystery was solved too.

It has been found and confirmed that Raveena has been bothered by these creatures ever since her hit song "Tu Cheese Badi Hai" hit the airwaves.