Magix 'n' Curses
..the argument continues

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

What actually happened

Remember the Tunnel scene in "Men In Black"? Here's what actually happened.


The midtown tunnel was usually always jammed. Regular commuters by that route knew better. They made sure to bring some magazines along with them, so that they could finish reading them by the time they crossed the tunnel back onto the expressway. A GRE aspirant was rumoured to have completed the entire Barrons while inching his way out of the tunnel.

*FLASH and the blurred screen comes back into focus*

Tom Ayto was in a hurry to get home. The shortest route was through the tunnel, and he was determined to swerve his way through the traffic back home even if it killed him. He figured he had an advantage, driving a compact car. He edged past a black Cadillac, and snuck through between a sports car and a Sedan. His victorious whoop was, however, short-lived, as he found himself obstructed by a gigantic truck. Dead end. Tom slapped his forehead in frustration.

*FLASH. Back to focus.*

Dick Tator was an enigma. His serious demeanor and smooth talk had earned him quite a reputation in the corridors of Law. Off the court, he redefined cool. Spotted most of the time in designer wear, zipping through the streets on his new bike, Dick enjoyed life as if everyday was his last. He was a man who thrived on challenges. Determined to meet his girlfriend, he'd placed a bet with himself to get to the other side of the tunnel even if the other vehicles had come to a standstill. Swerving between vehicles, he made no attempts to slow down. He noticed a car in front of him trying to do the same. Figuring it'd be a lot easier following the car, he tailed it all the way, almost crashing into the Cadillac that the car in front of him overtook. Finally, he saw light at the end of the tunnel. Unfortunately, it was the tail light of a truck in front of him. Dick came to a sudden halt beside the car, and threw a glance at the driver smacking his forehead.

*FLASH. Focus. *

Harry Leggs, the professional skateboard stuntman, worked his way home. In other words, he was going home on his skateboard. But even for someone who earned his livelihood risking his neck, the traffic jam was too much of a daunting task. He turned back and looked for a detour.


[These scenes were edited out though. The director preferred to deal only with the heroes. The following is what you would have seen in the movie.]

Tommy Lee Jones and Will Smith came hurtling down the road in their Ford LTD, not caring the least about the traffic jam ahead. With a casual click of a button, the car morphed into a kind of suction vehicle. Swerving to the side of the tunnel, the car zoomed up the wall and rocketed through the tunnel at breakneck speed, upside down. Once at the end of the tunnel, the car flipped back down and sped away leaving the rest gaping at them.


Thus, what Tom, Dick and Harry could not do, the Men In Black did, by crossing the tunnel inspite of several obstacles.

Moral of the story?

Where there's a Will, there's a way :)