Magix 'n' Curses
..the argument continues

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

A constant harangue and a drastic decision

Not a single weekend goes by without it. So much so that I've started to enjoy it!

* * * * * * * * * *

I'm a pretty strange creature. Or that's what my parents believe. Their justifications don't seem misplaced either. They still can't believe how a guy, living in a city where a temperature of 35 degrees is considered pleasant, where you break out into beads, nay, buckets of sweat when you step out of your house (and this in October!), where April-May gives Hell a run for its money, can be so averse to taking a bath!

It's all normal on weekdays when I have jus' about enough time to get ready to go to college, and I have a bath without a fuss. But come weekend, the morning stretches out so wonderfully in front of me, I'm more than happy to sit on the couch for hours on end, with a smug look of contentment on my face, doing absolutely nothing!

And the usual tirade starts.

"Harish.. poi kuli da", my Mom'd say as she bustles around the house giving a new meaning to the word "multitask".

"Iru ma... enna avasaram? Adhaan paper padichundu irukaen-la? Medhuva aparam kulichukaraen."

"Manasula collector nenappu! Ok. But don't tell me I didn't warn you. If Appa sees you, you're in for it!". And with these words of caution, she'd get back to trying to do 5 different things at once.

Sluggish apathy sets in once again, as I sit like a lazy lump on the couch, with a silly smile on my face, shooting off messages to three different people at once. Hey, but I'm not that sloth-y (for want of a word) all the time. I do have these sudden bursts of energy, when I'm inspired to get my butt off the couch, shift to a different place, and resume whatever I've been doing all that while! And at times when the burst of energy actually gets some momentum going, I walk all the way upstairs, to sit with the comp. Yup. I actually climb the stairs. Step by step. All 18 of them. (And no, I don't live in Sabari malai)

That's when, invariably, my Dad makes his entry.


(Feigning innocence, though I very well know what that tone means) "Enna pa?"

"Naan enna keppaen-nu unakke theriyum."

"Enna pa?" (Damn! So much for trying hard not to grin!!)


"He he he" (And those three words redefine "asattu vazhiyal")

"Vekkama illai? Oru brahmin boy, kulikaama, azhukoda... cha! Avalo chinna pasanga ellam, poonal potu, kaarthaala kulichu, sandhi panni, avalo active-a irukumbothu, unakenna? Unna sandhi pannu-nu kooda sollala. Aana unake oru sense of hygiene vendaam?"

"Ayyooo.. kulikaraen pa.. 5 mins-ku aparam!"

"Ok. I'll come back in 5 mins. You should have switched off the computer by then."

* 5 mins later*

"Nee innum inga enna pannrae?"

"Adhaan 5 mins-ku aparam kulikaraen sonene!"

*Repeat that vekkama illai dialogue with a few additions like..*
"Nee chinna payyan-a irukumbothu you used to love playing in the water. Appo irundha sense of hygiene, ippo enga pocho!"

"Appo enakku vera velai illai pa. Ippo irukku!"

(Realising he's fighting a losing cause here..) "Unnaala indha veyyil-la epadi thaan azhukoda irukka mudiyudho!"

"Ipadi thaan! :) "

BOOM!! I should have known not to push my luck too far! After a major dose, and a few threats of a disconnected internet connection, I trudge off downstairs, muttering to myself, forced to have my bath in the morning.

* * * * * * * * * *

This happens every weekend. And I actually enjoy this weekly err.. ritual! :D There are days when my dad's busy and I happily push my bath-time off further and further back till it's mid-afternoon, and I have nothing better to do than hit the shower. Now THAT gives me a sense of contentment. Don't know why. :)

But I have my study holidays now, and everyday seems like a weekend. It's almost a bloody battle between our patience and wit! And I seemed to be winning, till my folks came up with an extremely unfair warfare strategy. I hate to admit it, but they won the war. :(
I can't stretch out the lazy mornings anymore. I end up having a bath before (gasp!) 10 in the morning! :((

All thanks to 4 li'l words they've put up as a rule now.

No bath. No food.

Sigh. Parents can be so cruel...