Of smoke machines and PJs...

What's wrong with me? :(
I am just not able to study! Try as I might... one second in front of that dumb book and the reams of photocopies from my friends' notes, and I'm drooping off to sleep.

My sister's friend recently got married. And I came to realise just how much I hate social gatherings. Especially when I know no one there. There I was, grinning stupidly at people I was introduced to, not knowing what to say.

And that really had a bad effect on me, as I found out today when I nodded off to sleep trying to study.

*smoke starts filling in.. doesn't that happen in dreams?*
My lecturer was introducing me to a book, which strangely had hands (or I think it did... I have a vague feeling we shook hands). She said, "Harish, meet Analysis of Algorithms".

The next minute, I wake up to see my mom glaring at me, eyes bright and scary, nose twitching, ears smoking (so that's where the smoke came from!), and her voice in full blast, "EZHUNDHURU! RENDU NAAL-LA EXAM VECHUNDU ENNA THOOKAM VENDI KIDAKKU?"

I thought my dreams were "uninterpretable". But this one was piece o' cake. My next exam is Introduction to Analysis of Algorithms.

p.s:
I know it isn't funny. But I really wanted to post this link and didn't know how to! :) Grin n bear it! And I never realised switching between tenses so often could be this fun!

Meet Curses.. who forgot to collect his "Best Memory" award

No no, no such award. Just thought it made for a snappy title! :)
The paradox struck again today. I was busy watching the review of Manmadhan on Sun TV with a System Software exam the next day. I hate Simbhu. I didn't really like what I was seeing. I had loads of portions to complete. But hey, I couldn't tear myself away from the TV.

That's when I saw an advertisement, that in my opinion, has arguably the best marketing strategy. It was an ad for this memory pill thingy called Memory Vita. A schoolboy flunks in his exams (I dont believe in signs.. I don't believe in signs...) - his mom is worried - looks at the paper - sees an ad - is hit by a brainwave (what else?) - buys him that darned memory pill - and the boy tops his class. (Very imaginative.. *stifles a yawn*)

But it was the last frame that caught my attention. Nope, Ash wasn't endorsing it. It was this tiny scroll of text. It said, "90 days, Money Back Guarantee".

Brilliant! It doesn't get cleverer than this. If the product doesn't work, well, you'll obviously forget the money-back guarantee. If you do remember, and ask for your money back, the guy could very well say, "See Sir/Madam? You actually remembered 5 little words you saw 90 days back. The memory pills worked!"

Checklist of a Rahmaniac

Yessss, my checklist is complete now! The Making of the Airtel Sound and Express Yourself were nothing short of brilliant. Especially the steadily added layers in the latter. I can download them here.

But not right now. :( My Data Transfer Limit's dangerously close to maximum. I'll wait till the month ends.

The Unfortunate Paradox

Ever noticed how anything on TV seems suddenly interesting the night before an important exam? Even if it's a mega-serial where the ladies over-work their tearglands and try to create the Ganges overnight.
*sigh*

While still on paradoxes and ironies, I saw the most ironic sight I've ever seen.
Dust on a vacuum cleaner.

Blogger's block

Well, I'm not able to think of anything!!

A couple of days back, I'd started to write about Gilchrist's principle to walk and how he seems to be playing on the conscience of the batsmen from behind the stumps if they stand their ground. Saved it as draft, and came back to see the very same thing splashed all over the papers.. about his spat with McMillan.
Ctrl-A, Delete. :(

Am very happy to get DBMS outta my life (hopefully!). And I'm, quite understandably, blissfully disoriented.



p.s: I know this is a waste of bandwidth, but hey, it's free! So are the comments!

Living though a dream...

Today has been one of the weirdest days of my life! Went in such a superfast blur, I actually feel I've been through a dream.
Remind me to add this in my autobiography, if I ever write one. Hey, watch it. Don't take your eyebrow up that high! If Pamela Anderson can write her autobiography, so can I! (Coming to think of it, it isn't such a bad idea, especially since my statue's gonna be installed too!)

Ok, I'm digressing way too much. Lemme get back on track.

I woke up before the alarm went off (as I always do during exams).. and I didn't have even the slightest queasiness I normally get on the morning of an exam. I was actually feeling pretty confident I'd do my exam well. That was so un-me (un-me counter starts.. 1). The butterflies paid my stomach a visit only as I was about to enter the exam hall. Good, I'd been expecting them. :)

From then, my day went completely upside down. I started every problem confidently, only to get stuck somewhere. This happened, unfortunately, to almost all the questions. There has not been a single examination, where I've actually sat through the entire 3 hours. I just cannot. I either finish my exams pretty soon cause I'm well prepared, or I leave the exam hall early cause I don't know much. Today, I stayed for an extra 5 minutes (un-me counter.. 2). God bless that invigilator. (Whether the extra time helped, I never will know.)

I was almost in a state of shock. I had this dazed look stuck on my face from the time I left the exam hall. People actually came upto me and said, "Don't worry.. you will pass" even before they asked me how I'd done! Hmmm, I must have looked awful. It was almost 3 by the time I reached home, and I wasn't feeling too hungry (If there's anything un-me, this definitely is! Strike 3). My mom had made Pulao, and I mechanically ate it. Not a trace of that stupid grin that's normally plastered on my face whenever I eat pulao (that's 4 now). I got a vague idea of how bad I looked when my mom said, "I've never seen you like this. Forget the exam. Sleep well tonight, and start studying properly from tomorrow." (Should I start an un-mom counter?)

I switched on the television to catch the India - South Africa game. The way the Proteans dragged it out, I actually started feeling bored. And this is the same person who actually sat through a Holland-Namibia game (my un-me counter stopped working.. it has never been given this much work in a single day.. besides, I realise it's getting on your nerves!). And then, I got the most shocking news of the day.
Glenn McGrath scores a half century. :o
And no, there weren't any flying pigs sighted over the Gabba. :)

My friend B called me up and laughed his guts out! I was pretty amused myself. Certainly helped ease my tension a bit. And from there-on, the day once again turned on its head. A couple of friends called me up and said they'd forgotten to wish me yesterday with all that exam tension. But, of course, they didn't forget to ask me for a treat! Not to worry fellas, sure-a kudukaren. :)

Wondering why I'm being so cheerful all of a sudden, especially after all that I've gone through today? That's coz my sister gave me the best surprise I've ever received. My new cellphone! Thanks a million, sis! I promise I'll be nice to you (for the next one month atleast!! hehe). And here I am, typing all this out, over a very yummy pizza, the second one I've had this week.

Life isn't so bad, afterall. :)

Deva!! How how how?! :)

This man is unbelievable.

Agreed. He's created a whole new dimension to the gaana genre of music. And he has managed a few beautiful melodies. But his notoriety for his shameless copies effortlessly vaults over the popularity of his original (?) hits.

I pity Karthik, the webmaster of I2FS (a website that keeps tab of Indian film songs that are inspired/copied from other sources). Check out the section on Deva. He seems to be hogging all the bandwidth! :)

But the reason I'm writing this is for his latest song in the album Ramakrishna. My friend B and I heard it first when we were returning from college. We looked at each other for a second, and broke into wicked grins, eyes all atwinkle. And before we knew it, we were trembling uncontrollably with suppressed laughter. I had tears of mirth streaming down my cheeks. Deva was singing in English!!
Watch out Blaaze. You've got serious competition, mate!

You gotta hear it to believe it. Deva sings something that I haven't, to date, managed to understand. I believe it is Tamil. But it's the last line that hooked us in... Deva croons "why, why, why, why, why, why, why?". As I wipe that tear off the corner of my eye, I can't help but admit, stroke of a genius!

I've been trying to catch the trailor ever since. And yesterday, I succeeded. It starts off with a long list of clippings of movies that played in theatres for barely 3 days. And with Deva's close-up, a proud banner announces, "Indha vetri pada varisayil varum... Deva isaiyil... RAMAKRISHNA"! These guys are brilliant I tell ya! Who needs stand-up comedians when we've got these guys! After a few quick clippings of some (very ordinary) songs from the movie, I caught the song, that I'd surely proclaim (amidst a few chuckles, of course) the pathbreaking song of the year.

Now comes the sad part. I should have switched off my television right then. I unfortunately saw the end of the trailor, where a very prominent Ctrl C - Ctrl V job had been done. Straight off the track Dacoits Duel, from Rahman's Warriors of Heaven and Earth.

*sigh* Dude, you just won't learn..
And advance birthday(20th Nov) wishes to you.

Awww, alright... Congratulations!

And that's the way the cookie crumbles...

Now I know why they say Dame Luck. Roughly rewritten, it spells Miss Fortune, or more appropriately in my case, misfortune. :( (Hmm.. coming to think of it, it rhymes with Lame Luck too!)

I've been ruing my dumb luck ever since Anna University announced my exam schedule. Why God, why? What kinda sadistic pleasure do they derive out of doing this to me? Has the devil announced a Trouble-magix-and-get-paid scheme?

Ok, ok.. I'll stop here before I'm totally engulfed by this bitter-sweet comforting li'l factor, that's my self-pity. Cause the way I was ranting, there were bound to be a few well-aimed curses hurled at me anyways!

So here's my problem (No, no, not the exams.. I don't call them problems. The word Problem is jus' not strong enough!!). My birthday falls on the eve of my exams. No wait, lemme put it this way.. My exams start exactly the day after my birthday. And I will have to spend every minute of it cursing my bad luck and keeping my nose buried to the damn text book. (This sounds more tragic, doesn't it?) :)

And to add insult to injury, salt to an open wound, fuel to fire, (and many more such dramatic blahblahs) the cellphone I was promised on my b'day was put on hold (no pun intended). :( My mom's suddenly scared I won't study. Guess she has a different reason, but this is what she told me anyways! Who's she kidding? Doesn't she know her own son? Does she actually think buying me a cellphone's gonna distract me from studies? Shouldn't she be knowing by now that I cannot be anymore distracted than I'm at the moment?!! :)
(Amma, if ur reading this I'm kidding.. don't worry!)
(psssst, if someone else is reading this, I was kidding about the kidding!)

So there you go folks. What more can disturb this badly battered morale of mine? (Did you say a disconnected internet connection? Are you the devil himself?)

Chennai Bloggers meet

I'm still pinching myself.
I was actually sitting amidst those very people I looked upto as inspirations.

Thanks guys, I had great fun! :)

p.s:
I know what ur thinking.. but it is possible for a person to be silent and have fun at the same time! :)
p.p.s:
Err, can i borrow ur snaps for my blog? :D

Updated on 16.11:
Hmmm, now how did I forget this?! Here's the list of people who attended the meet..
(I'll start with the person who sat on my right, easier to remember!) :)
Vijay, Kribs, Dinesh, Chandrachoodan (Ravages), Karthik, Nirenjan, Guru, Chenthil, Desikan, Prabhu (Ferrari) and me.

The pictures will be up soon.

Updated on 17.11:
Got the pictures. Thanks a lot, Nirenjan.
Here they are..

Yet another "day"

Woaaahhh!! This is a revelation! There are actually people more vetti than me.

I mean, who else would actually spend time thinking of some special significance for every single day! Calender-la oru naal vittu vekkarathu kidayaathu. (Check this out..) And the significance ranges from significant (duh!), to thoughtful, to funny, to bizarre!
Check these out these samplers,

• New Year's Day - 1st Jan
• Independence Day - 15th Aug (India)

• Mother's Day - 2nd Sunday - May
• Father's Day - 3rd Sunday - June

• Have a bad day Day - 19th Nov (Idhu Ulnaatu Sadhi!) :(
• Yell "Fudge" at cobras in North America Day - 2nd Jun (Dont ask!)

And there are some very bizarre days too... But I don't think I'll list them. Check them out yourself.

Today, we celebrate Children's Day to honour Jawaharlal Nehru's Birthday (no debates there). So in keeping with the spirit of changing times, the Indian Government has decided to honour another special day. They have not been able to decide on the date yet, and have asked me to come up with the perfect date for... Kotaan's day!!
May I know your Date of Birth, please? :)

292.. and not enough

I've got only one thing to say.

It slipped away from us.

And yeah, the centurion certainly ain't gonna be the butt of jokes for quite a while now.

Updated on 16.11 :
Well, well, well.. whadya know.. Sanjay Manjrekar thinks exactly the same thing. That was what I meant by "slipping away".

Flash News!!!

News@9..

This is just in, folks.

Floods in Chennai! The report that has reached our newsdesk mentions that the floods were caused due to some mysterious circumstances and was especially prevalent in Thiruvanmiyur, Little Mount, IIT Campus and Velachery. Our special correspondent, not one to shirk his duty especially when it comes to challenging assignments, braved the floods and has found out the reason for this abnormal phenomenon in Chennai (of all the places)!

Note: Opening these links in new windows recommended.

• Mysterious Circumstance 1 - check 1400
  
• Mysterious Circumstance 2 - check 1730
  
• Mysterious Circumstance 3 - check 2130
  

And remember, you heard it first on CursesNews! :)

The day we walked...

I had the strangest feeling today... that my life bordered on "boring". It was then that my friend reminded me of that fateful day - The day we walked...

It all started when a test was announced in class. It was scheduled to be held in the afternoon session. But fate intervened, and our seniors announced a trip to The Chennai Trade Centre where an IT fair was being held. We were to be dropped there by our college bus, but had to find our way back home ourselves. That was when the action started.

The 3 of us (my friends B & M and moi) trooped out pondering how to get back. Thiruvanmiyur seemed so distant all of a sudden. We couldn't help but be disgruntled about the way they'd named the damn place - Centre, my foot. We walked for at least a quarter of an hour before we came to a bus-stop.. and were quite puzzled about it, considering that Chennai Trade Centre's quite an important place. We were to learn, the next day, that we could have jus walked 50 yards to our left instead of all that distance to our right! Anyways.. perhaps that walk was just a sampler of things to come.

We didn't know the first thing about bus routes there. We figured that taking a bus to Guindy or Saidapet was the best bet. Guindy seemed the more practical option. After a long wait, we did get one that dropped us off opposite the Sangeetha Restaurant, Guindy. From there-on, it was gonna be easy. Or so we thought.

Along came ECR-Pondy, a bus that was going right through our town. But we, especially my friend M, redefine paranoia. We clarified w/ the conductor that it indeed went through Thiruvanmiyur and got on. (An ECR Pondy bus has no other route to go!) B went to buy the tickets. M's house was quite close to a boarding point on the ECR, and he asked the conductor if he could get down there. The conductor's face twisted into a look that was somewhere between annoyed and insane! He said "Thiruvanmiyur poravanga ellam keezha erangunga". We just blinked back at him, thinking we'd misheard him. Was he asking us to get down? And unfortunately, it seemed he was, for all of a sudden he shouted "KEEZHA ERANGA SONNAEN-LA?" and literally shooed us outta the bus!

We didnt know what hit us! We stood there, in the middle of a busy intersection in Guindy, w/ our minds completely numb w/ shock. Shoo us, he did, but couldn't he have chosen a better spot? :( We were at the head of the Sardar Patel Road, and not a bus stop in sight. And where did those damned share-autos go when you need them the most? We started walking, figuring there had to be a bus-stop somewhere. It was then that the injustice of it all hit us. Why the hell did he push us out? How rude! M, who's quite obsessed w/ bureaucracy (dont know why!), commented, "That guy's thrown out a future Bureaucrat, a future technocrat and a budding Corporate Autocrat.. He's got it in for him one of these days". B was fuming. He looked as if he'd never been insulted like this before. He kept shaking his head. And I, "the future technocrat" :), just found the whole episode amusing! M was still mumbling something like "avan seat kizhiyum da, paarthunde iru", when B said "You know what? Gandhi was thrown out of a train. And he became a famous man. Perhaps...". He trailed off, as all of a sudden, our disoriented minds clicked into place, and we found the episode a 100 times funnier! I said "Aamam, nee vena paaru.. Pietermaritzburg-la avarukku selai vecha maathiri, ippo nambalukkum Guindy-la vepaanga". And we broke into hysterics , laughing till our jaws hurt, kneeling down on the pavement, blissfully oblivious of people staring at us!

We realised how long we'd walked only as Anna University loomed into view. We'd actually walked all the way from Guindy railway station to Anna University. And believe me, it's a long distance! We called it "The Guindy March", and are still pretty certain that our statues are gonna be installed at that busy intersection. Oh, and I should add, with an umbrella over our heads (damn birds!). The incident has rankled us to such an extent that we still give dirty glares whenever an ECR-Pondy bus goes by.

And I still wonder,

• Why did he throw us out?
  
• How did we, 3 self-proclaimed happy-to-be-lazy dudes, actually walk that distance?
• Was fate really that sadistic to save me from a test, and put me through a bigger misery?
  
• And how, pray I ask, do those birds target statues like precision missiles?
  

Happy Diwali!

Or should I say Iniya Deepavali Nalvaazhthukal.

It's a pity Diwali had to come jus when my exams are round the corner. But hey, it's better than spending your Birthday studying for a Math exam the next day!

I've never been able to churn out those long, verbose, grand greetings like the guys who create e-cards. So lemme jus say it my way..

Have a fantastic day tomorrow, people! :)

Update:
Jus caught the Thank You Amma show (!!) on Jaya TV. Exactly as Rahman's part came in! Right after Chinmayee finished singing the very soulful "Deivam thandha poovae", Hariharan and another man (Err.. who was that?) T.L. Maharajan came on stage. And to my surprise, started singin "Yun Hi Chala" (Swades) in Tamil! TLM was good.. his voice damn nearly matched Kailash Kher's. Hariharan, as he always does when Rahman's around :( , started his vocal acrobatics. Rahman couldn't but smile. :) But the most on-key of the lot, were the kids who came on to sing Vande Mataram.
Happy Diwali again!

Not yet Duped :)

See that previous blog? Ignore it!! :)

I thought i was geeky enough.. but this had me sweating! Big blow to my ego! :(

Well, I guess learning from others' experiences does come in handy!
Thanks Ramya! :)

Haloscan commenting and trackback have been added to this blog.

Crashlanding on the Planet Weblog.

Errr.. Hi..
*looks around nervously*

This is magix. Yet another split personality case in the blogosphere. :)
I'm (supposed to be) this sweet-lil-boy-next-door, always helpin out people, and not sayin a rude word. Well, my neighbours may have second thoughts about validating that.. but hey, this is my blog, and I am what I say I am!
I've been on read-only mode in quite a few blogs and sometimes butted in w/ my opinions when the context isn't too serious! :D So there, you've got a tiny peek into my character. A trifle shy, a little reticent when it comes to expressin my opinion in serious issues... waitees. Too many "I"s for a beginner. But, hehe, lemme introduce you to my(!) alter-ego, curses.
curses is what magix is not. Not to the extent of Jim Carrey in Me, Myself n Irene, but close enough. :) He gives vent to all of magix's frustrations and does all the nakkal business magix likes, but is shy of doing.

Ohh man, I'm almost beginning to sound like Reggie Mantle here...
I'll stop. :) And dont worry, you won't be subjected to this torture again!

And may the Gods of the blogosphere bless me as I push that publish button...